How to make a first date less awkward. 12 tips to avoid first-date awkwardness and have a successful date that goes well.
First dates come with exciting possibilities, and also inevitably an awkward moment or two. Not to mention the anxiety or uncertainty that comes up before you even get to the date.
All things considered, it’s no wonder that even the most confident person can feel uneasy at just the mere thought of going on a first date.
Luckily, there are ways to make a first date more comfortable and enjoyable.
In today’s article, I’m sharing with you how to make a first date less awkward. With 12 easy ways to feel less nervous and banish those uncomfortable moments. So you and your date can have a great time.
How To Make A First Date Less Awkward
1. Manage Your Expectations
First up, is to manage your expectations about the date. As a dating coach one of the biggest mistakes that I see people making is that they go on a first date with too many expectations. Which puts too much pressure on themselves and the other person to have the “perfect date”.
Ultimately resulting in heightened stress and anxiety. As well as, awkward moments and often disappointment about how the date went.
While yes, of course you want to hope for the best. It’s important to keep in mind that it’s only a first date. You are not going to meet your future spouse.
So before the date remind yourself to relax and have fun simply connecting with a new person. If you click then that’s great! If not, then you met someone new that’s probably pretty cool, just not your person.
2. Have A Positive Mindset
Go into your date with an attitude that’s positive and curious, and look for moments of connection. Which will tell you if you like this person enough to go on a second date with them.
Having a positive mindset and being curious also helps you to take the pressure off that everything must go perfectly. Which means that you’re much more likely to overcome any awkward moments that may arise.
3. Choose A Fun Activity Based Date
To make the date as least awkward as possible avoid boring coffee dates and chose an enjoyable activity based date instead. Activities such as Museums, Mini Golf, Bowling, Trivia Nights and Comedy Shows are all great places to go on a first date.
These date ideas are fun and engaging and are great way to get to know someone new in a low-pressure way. Plus, if you’re stuck for what to talk about, there’s plenty of first date conversation starters easily around. Which can come in handy during those awkward moments of silence.
For more low-pressure date activities here’s a list of 50 fun low-key first date ideas (that aren’t awkward).
4. Stay Away From Boring Coffee Dates
Avoid meeting up for coffee dates where you’re sitting across from each other trying to force an interesting conversation. While coffee dates may seem quick and easy, they can quickly spiral into feeling like you’re at a job interview. Which means there’s almost zero chance for intriguing conversation or romance.
If you feel like you need a date that’s just as quick a better option is to get coffee or ice cream and pair it with an easy activity. Such as walking around an interesting market, or book store together.
5. Always Talk On The Phone (or FaceTime) Before A First Date
I always recommend to my coaching clients that they have a phone call before meeting someone new in person. You can also chat via video call, or over FaceTime if you prefer. This is for a few reasons.
First off, talking on the phone before your first date makes it less awkward because it helps you connect and get a sense of other’s personality and general vibe. That way when you meet in person they aren’t a total stranger.
So you can go into that first date feeling more relaxed and confident about how the date will go. Now that you’ve already established a rapport and know a bit about each other.
Which is extremely helpful in getting those first date awkward moments out of the way.
It also helps to give you an idea about their personality and wether or not they’re a good match for you. Furthermore, if it gives you some certainty that they are who they say they are.
And lock in and plan the final details of the date. Which means you are less likely to get ghosted.
Related – How To Get A Guy To Call You
6. Have A Few Good Conversation Starters On Hand
To deal with any uncomfortable silences, make sure to come to the date prepared with a few good conversation starters. As well as, ask open ended questions about passions, hobbies and interests. Which will help to create an emotional connection and keep the conversation interesting and flowing.
If you need a few conversation topics and ideas to stop those annoying awkward silences here’s a list of the best first date conversation starters.
7. Greet Your Date With A Hug
Two of the most awkward moments on a first date involve the initial greeting and breaking the touch barrier. One of the best ways to overcome these two obstacles is to get things started off on the right foot. By way of ditching the weird business-like handshake, and instead greeting your date warmly with a hug.
Hugs are great because they set the tone, and minimize potential awkwardness. While conveying a sense of confidence and genuine warmth. Which if things go well, also makes touching later, easier and feel much more natural.
In addition, to minimize any potential awkward interactions remember to smile, maintain eye contact and keep your body language relaxed and open.
8. Listen From A Place Of Curiosity
Listening is just as important as talking. Take an interest in what your date has to say and ask them open ended questions. About their passions, goals and dreams for the future. This will help you to feel more connected and get to know each other on a deeper level. As well as, keep your conversation lively and interesting.
9. Avoid Talking About Ex’s
One of the biggest mistakes people make on first dates is talking about their exes. This can make your date feel uncomfortable. As well as, make you look like you’re bitter, angry, or not over your past relationship.
How To Not Be Awkward On A First Date
10. Avoid Controversial Topics
If you want to have a first date that goes as smoothly as possible then you’ll want to avoid potentially awkward topics. Such as politics or religion. While those are important, you can always find out more about which way they lean later. Or through other related topics that come up in conversation.
That said, in my experience as a professional dating coach I don’t think that it’s bad to bring up politics. Or other beliefs that you’re truly passionate about on a first date.
In fact I think that you should. That way you know if this person is truly a match for you. You just need to do in away that is through curiosity over judgment.
However, you have to be prepared that the conversation may get take an uncomfortable turn. Which isn’t necessarily a bad thing. Especially where dealbreakers are involved.
However, if you’re not prepared to do that early on that’s ok. Just make sure you ask any important questions about beliefs etc. no latter than your third date. Even if you’re worried about talking about a subject that might feel uncomfortable.
Good relationships are built on communication. Sometimes that communication can feel awkward or difficult. However the more you practice the better you’ll get at it.
For ideas of what to ask by the third date here’s a full list of the Best Third Date Questions.
11. Embrace Any Awkward Moments Of Silence
An awkward silence is bound to happen. But, they aren’t necessarily bad or have to be totally uncomfortable. Instead of freaking out, or overthinking things and trying to fill the silence with awkward chatter.
Take a breath, be present and remind yourself that this is all normal. Your date is probably just as nervous as you are.
Once you do you’ll soon find the tension ease and the moment pass. Thereby, allowing the conversation to naturally start-up again.
12. Be Authentic (Don’t Try Too Hard)
We all want to put our best foot forward on a date. But try not to put too much pressure on yourself to be perfect. Or feeling like you have to impress your date by being a version of someone that you think they’ll like.
The truth is that both men and women are more attracted to authenticity and confidence over anything else. So what’s most important to finding the right partner is that you’re showing up as you on your dates.
Which is great news, because now you don’t have to constantly be worrying about how you’re coming across. You can just relax and enjoy yourself and live your life as you. Knowing that the right person is going to be attracted to exactly who you are.
Which ultimately helps make the night a memorable experience for both you and your date.
Bonus Tip: Keep Your First Date Short And Sweet
First dates can loose steam and quickly go down hill if they drag on too long. This person is a stranger after all. So, if you’re meeting for the first time after matching on an app like tinder, hinge or bumble, then keep your date to between 1 and 2 hours max.
Remember this is essentially a first meeting to see if there’s enough potential to go on a second date. Even if its going really well it’s ok to end the night early on a high note.
Related – Are first dates always awkward? What’s ok? For answers check out my article > “Is It Normal For First Dates To Be Awkward?”
Now You Know How To Make First Dates Less Awkward
While there’s nothing like really clicking on a date there’s bound to be an uncomfortable moment or two. But there’s also bound to be some fun, and hopefully flirty moments too!
So don’t forget to lighten the mood and have fun too! Try throwing a few flirty questions into the mix. Or break the ice and the tension, by way of asking your date a few “flirty would you rather questions“.
I hope that these tried-and-true tips for how to make a first date less awkward helps make your next date go much more smoothly.
Here’s to having a great first non-awkward date! And hopefully many more to come.
**What To Read Next In Dating**
- Should I Confirm A Date With A Guy?
- Why You Can’t Get A Second Date (& What To Do Now)
- 3 Things You Must Do On A First Date (If You Want To Get Asked Out Again)
- Flirty Texts
**THE NEXT STEP**
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